It was a frantic start to the date. But it ended in bliss: Dating Diaries

The daters: Gillian and Adam

Gillian says: “I was married once. We broke up and I met my second husband immediately. He helped me move out of my home with my first husband. I broke up with him after almost 20 years and moved out last year. I decided a few months ago I was ready to move on, and that I was brave enough to try online dating.”

Gillian is looking for “an older, fully formed person. I want to be with someone without either of us wanting to change anything about the other one.”

How we met: Online

Where we went: A pub

When I first started dating online, it was awful. The messages I got were hideous. Who knew you needed such fortitude for online dating? I decided within days it wasn’t for me. Then Adam messaged me. He asked me really interesting questions, which led to really interesting conversations. I even agreed to move the conversation over to text. We couldn’t text enough. I forgot all about the app a few days later. Our first phone conversation lasted just over three hours. It was me that said, ‘So, are we going to meet?’ ”

We decided Adam would come to my neighbourhood and I chose a pub where I felt comfortable. It was nearby but felt a safe distance away from my home, for anonymity. On the day of, though, there was a snowstorm. It was very snowy and icy. I decided to go out on a limb and trust that he wasn’t an axe murderer and allow Adam to come and meet me in my lobby. Since I had moved in, I had not had a man in my lobby or my apartment.

This was my first date in 20 years, and it was personal: it was about me having courage. I had recently given myself a makeover. Before I started dating, I had decided I needed to know who I was, in terms of fashion and accessories. I had so much fun doing that I didn’t even think of dating at the time. But now I was ready to unveil the new me!

I looked amazing. I was so ready. It was 10 minutes out. I planned on being casually draped in the lobby. Then I realized I couldn’t find my keys. Anywhere. I began panicking. Time was ticking. OMG. I began pulling everything out of cupboards and drawers. The floor was littered with piles. I called my best friend who lives around the corner and has a spare key. She sent her husband over. He arrived on the phone with her, because she wanted updates on how I looked. He was shocked, because my place looked like it had been ransacked. I got the key.

I went downstairs and Adam was in the vestibule. I could see my reflection as I walked around the corner, full of gratitude toward my friends for helping me out, and for looking great.

My eyes met Adam’s, and I liked him. He said later that I blew his mind, but he was holding a leash attached to a huge Golden Retriever. My bubble burst. My first words were, “You brought your f*cking dog?” At that very moment the dog’s actual owner — who had been struggling to pick up the dog’s poo outside — came in and thanked Adam for kindly holding on to her dog. The three of us laughed so hard, it really broke the ice.

I told Adam so much had happened in the last 10 minutes that I needed to sit for a moment in the lobby and catch my breath. He laughed about the key when I explained it.

From that moment, it was fabulous and so relaxed. We went to dinner. Adam was kind and gentlemanly. He opened doors, and he shared food and he was solicitous without being annoying, fake or overbearing. It felt so easy and natural yet exciting. We were very compatible.

When our long, slow, lovely dinner was over we went to a bar for drinks. We had such a good time that we were both shocked when they told us they were closing. I felt like we were sparkling all night.

The date ended with a wonderful kiss — and a little more, but I’m not sure if you’re supposed to mention that at this age! We have been seeing each other since, just naturally and easily. Who knew it could all be so fun. He is a keeper.

Gillian rates her date (out of 10): 10